Summer is almost over, and with it comes a grief of sorts. Kids going back to school or that beach trip or vacation I wanted to take, didn’t happen. Maybe it’s something bigger, like a job loss, marriage that ended, kids away from the church or health issue. What ever the issue, Jesus understands.
Sometimes God speaks to us through Scripture in ways that meet us exactly where we are.
This Sunday’s Gospel (Matthew 14: 13-21) reminded me of something profound: Jesus understands grief, weakness, and suffering, and the need to withdraw and pray. Yet He doesn’t stop his mission even in the midst of his pain.
The Gospel tells us that Jesus heard the devastating news that His cousin John the Baptist had been beheaded for preaching the Gospel. His response was not to ignore His sorrow or pretend everything was fine. Jesus went away in a boat to a deserted place.
Jesus, in His humanity, needed time with the Father. He needed prayer. He needed solitude. He needed space to grieve. But when Jesus returned to shore, He found a crowd waiting for Him. A common human reaction at the sight of the crowd may have been something like, “I can’t deal with this now! Or Really God?” Yet Jesus could see people were suffering. They were sick. They were searching for hope. And the Gospel tells us that Jesus was “moved with compassion”. Even in His own sorrow, Jesus stepped forward to serve. He healed the sick, preached the Gospel, and in that same scene he feed the multitude of over 5,000 with the 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish the disciples had given Him. Jesus took that small offering and performed the miracle of multiplication. The people were fed and were satisfied. And the disciples collected 12 baskets full of bread!
The message is powerful: suffering does not make us useless. Grief does not mean our purpose is over. Weakness does not mean God is finished with us.
During the homily, our priest also shared the story of St. Camillus de Lellis, a man who was a strong Roman solider and compulsive gambler. He suffered with a very painful leg condition. I have had a very serious, permanent, debilitating leg injury myself that I’ve been dealing with for over 2 years, so this detail immediately caught my attention. St. Camillus, in his pain and suffering, while in the hospital, converted to Jesus. He gave up his soldier post and became a hospital worker, and later administrator of the hospital, and founded the Minister of the Sick, the Order of St. Camillius religious community to care for plague victims and the dying. He is recognized as a patron saint of hospitals.
The order is still active today! In fact, his religious order and red cross emblem was adopted by the founders of the international Red Cross organization. The red cross design and concept of neutral medical assistance from this long-standing Catholic tradition is the reason the Red Cross Society adopted it.
God never healed St. Camillius’ leg. It inhibited his daily life and mission. St. Camillius faced a choice that many of us face when life does not turn out the way we hoped. Would St. Camillius remain stuck in grief and isolation? Would he numb himself and withdraw from life? Or would he follow the example of Christ—step back into the crowd and continue his mission while carrying his suffering?
He chose to continue walking with Christ. That message touched me deeply because many of us spend so much time waiting for healing before we move forward. We think: “Once this problem is solved, then I can begin again.” “Once my circumstances improve, then I can have peace.” “Once I am stronger, then I can serve.” But Jesus shows us another way.
He does not always remove the suffering immediately. Sometimes He gives us the grace to carry it with Him. This does not mean ignoring our limitations. Jesus Himself withdrew to pray. He recognized the need for rest and solitude. We are called to care for the bodies and souls God has given us.
But we are also called not to let our wounds become the whole story. A difficult season may change our path, but it does not erase our purpose. A loss may reshape our lives, but it does not take away the gifts God has given us. The question becomes not only: “Lord, when will this suffering end?” But also: “Lord, how can I love You and serve You in this season?” Christ does not wait for us after we are healed. He meets us in the middle of our weakness. He meets us in the boat. He meets us on the shore. He meets us among the crowds. And He walks with us.
If you are carrying something today that has not yet been healed, remember this You do not have to be completely healed to be faithful. You do not have to have everything figured out to follow Jesus. Your suffering is not the end of your story. The One who called you is still walking with you.
